I Forgot

I forgot what it’s like to have a job that doesn’t end when the workday is over.

I forgot how it feels to spend my weekends and off hours writing lesson plans. (Grading papers hasn’t started yet.)

I forgot what it’s like to work with children at this age.

I forgot how hard the first month can be, as they learn about me and I learn about them.

I forgot how easily their attention wanders.

I forgot what it takes to keep them focused on academic subjects.

I forgot how fixated they can become on something new or different.

I forgot how difficult it is for them to sit still for long periods of time.

I forgot how a rumbling stomach makes it next-to-impossible to focus on work for the last ten minutes before lunch.

I forgot how often bodies that small need to use the bathroom.

I forgot how distracting a paper cut or a banged shin can be.

I forgot how much the word “stupid” can hurt.

I forgot how much the word “sorry” can mend.

I forgot the joy of recess.

I forgot the spark of curiosity.

I forgot how it feels to fan that spark into a flame.

I forgot how wonderful it is to watch the light bulb go off.

I forgot how great it is to have the kids run over to me in the morning, yelling, “Hi Mr. CJ!”

I forgot the hugs that take out your kneecaps.

I forgot laughing with the kids when I do something silly.

I forgot laughing when I’m alone, reading students’ worksheets and seeing their best guesses for spelling hard words.

I forgot the gap-tooth smiles.

I forgot the lows, but I also forgot the highs.

I remember now.

1 comment
  1. That is beautiful CJ. Congratulations on your reentry, and thank you for sharing.

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